Coming of Age on the Internet

Hey all.

You can build a statue two ways. You can take a big rock, and chip away anything that isn't your statue. Or, you can take a bunch of pieces of things and weld them together.

I don't have a big rock handy.

Zendik

1996. I've driven down to visit my friend Colin at the University of Texas in Austin. The streets are crowded with all manner of people - some selling jewelry or paintings out of little carts. Some smoking cigarettes and asking each other for money. And as we step out of a shop full of colorful Japanese toys, a man in combat fatigues accosts us, peddling his culture.

Colin and I knew each other from a BBS he ran back in high school. One of the hot topics there had always been creating communes and alternative cultures. That was back in the early nineties, still a few years before the web hit and a couple decades too late for the commune craze. There wasn't much information about alternative communities in the US, and what there was - back in high school, anyway - all seemed to come from one place. Zendik Farm, then about half an hour's drive from Austin, TX.

The man on the street is a Zendik. He introduces himself as Jyre and offers us a copy of their magazine for a buck. If that's not enough, he's got tapes of the Zendik band. We tell him we're actually visiting the Farm in the morning. He seems impressed.

The Zendiks have a sense of self-righteousness like no other group I've met. They out-attitude just about every group I've come in contact with in the holier-than-thou department. They seem to think they have all the answers, perhaps even all the questions. And if not, they're certainly pursuing those answers quicker and better than you are. It's like a culture of human potential trainers.

And yet, what they do works. They grow their own crops organically. They've built their own buildings with their own architectural designs. And they teach others from all over the world what they've learned through a six week apprenticeship program.

The Zendiks want nothing more than to start a peaceful revolution in America. To destroy what they call the "deathkultur" and bring their greener, happier, way of life to the rest of the world. For all that, you'd think they'd have a decent website.

The Zendiks still approach people on the street to push their eco-lifestyle. I suppose that toughens new members: turns them into preachers and futher indoctrinates them. And I'm sure it gets them some attention. But hitting the streets and spreading your beliefs to random, unsuspecting strangers? Perhaps it's just part of their in-your-face mentality. But there's got to be a better choice than street spam.

At home, they're a peaceful crowd. When we pulled up the next morning to their big purple house in the middle of nowhere, TX, a small group of them was gathered outside under a huge tree. We got a tour from a guy who'd taken the name Verdant.

He showed us a beautiful, small building they'd created - a cross between a geodesic dome and a gingerbread house. We saw the garden where they were luring bugs away from crops by surrounding them with other plants. We ate lunch - something green - with a bunch of Zendiks who talked about why they'd come. We helped a lady build a floor, and spent some time pulling weeds from another garden. And part of the time, we just relaxed and talked. It's probably the most serene day I can remember.

You'd think they might share that side of their lives. You'd think you'd be able to go to their website and see exactly how to run a decent neoculture. How to build a working society without internal money. How to handle education, health, d isagreements. What you see is a handful of their basic philosophies, a couple personal member stories, and that's about it. Everything else is under construction.

Out of Control

A colony of ants on the move from one nest site to another exhibits the Kafkaesque underside of emergent control. As hordes of ants break camp and head west, hauling eggs, larva, pupae ... other ants of the same colony, patriotic workers, are hauling the trove east again just as fast, while still other workers, perhaps acknowledging conflicting messages, are running one direction and back again completely empty-handed... Yet the ant colony moves. Without any visible decision making at a higher level, it chooses a new nest site, signals workers to begin building... No one is in control, and yet an invisible hand governs, a hand that emerges from very dumb members.

-- Kevin Kelley, Out of Control

Idea Drive

You know what success is? Success is taking a good idea, and investing enough time and energy into making it happen.

I don't know about you, but I have more ideas than I know what to do with. It's the time and energy that I'm lacking. Lately, I've been spending almost all my time working on a handful of specific ideas that are most important to me. The others will probably never happen.

I bet you've had a good idea that you're never going to use. Why not give it away to someone who could use it?

That's the idea behind the idea drive, a new website I'm building. It's basically a suggestion box for the universe. You'll be able to search for ideas based on categories or keywords. And of course, everyone is invited to contribute.

More on that next issue, when the software (which more or less works) is presentable.

Coming of Age on the Internet

I think coming of age means taking responsibility for your own life. It means deciding what you want and going after it, no matter what it takes. I think I'm finally beginning to take responsibility for creating what I want in life. I'm finding it usually doesn't take that much.

Back in August, a friend of mine invited me on a trip to Mexico. I'd just taken a week off to visit my family, and I figured there was no way I'd get another week off from work. I worried that I'd have to give up my job to go. I wasn't exactly thrilled with what I was doing at the time. I'd been working like crazy and I was getting burned out. My last vacation hadn't helped. Even though I love my company, I figured if it came down to it, I'd probably just quit.

I used to think like that all the time. Downward spiral. Someone told me once that I seemed to enjoy suffering.

It turns out I just asked. My boss said sure. My vacation time is mine to do with as I like.

Oh. Well. Yay! Right? So we went. We had fun. It's another story.

Since the trip, I've decided to make more decisions. Like taking care of my finances. Like spending more time with real people. Like writing more. Like getting serious about goals.

I decided to change some things at work. I wanted a new environment. Within two days, I had another project lined up: A new client, and a lot more autonomy in what I'm doing. Best of all, I'm working on the web again.

I've got a long way to go. It's been eons since I've met anyone my age. Ever since Lori and I broke up, I've been too busy working and building my website to have much of a social life. I've decided that needs to change.

Well, I won't go on about this now. I write HTB to chronicle what I learn, and to learn I've got to do something. So I'll just offer a challenge to myself and to anyone else who wants to take it:

Go live an interesting life.